by Scotia
Six year old Andrea Carter jumped out of bed with excitement. “My whole
family’s going for a picnic!” she squealed out loud in excitement. She
had looked forward to this ever since… well… yesterday, when Mother had
announced it. There was a special brook, and lots of shady trees,
and—this was the best part—squirrels!
Andi dressed in her comfiest overalls, then hoisted herself onto
the stairs railing and happily plummeted down. Realizing too late that
she would fly off the edge, she squeezed her eyes shut and braced
herself—
And found herself landing safely in Justin’s arms. One eye
peeked open, then the other. The little girl laughed, throwing her arms
around her brother’s neck. “You saved me, big brother!” she giggled.
“One more second and I would have flew off the edge!”
“Yes, I know,” her favorite oldest brother replied, grinning. “I saw you.”
Andi hopped down, then holding Justin’s hand, ran into the
kitchen. She flung her arms around her mother. “I can’t wait for the
picnic!” Andi squealed. “When will we leave?”
“Right after breakfast,” Mother replied, smiling. “But we won’t go anywhere unless you have your breakfast first.”
Andi walked to her seat and sat down beside Melinda and Chad.
She gobbled down her breakfast, though she wasn’t very hungry, but she
DID so want to go to the picnic. Then she ran off to Taffy’s stable and
hoped everyone else would come soon.
The picnic started immediately, great to Andi’s enjoyment. All
the way to the clearing, she chattered to Justin and her other brothers
about how fun it would be. While Justin was the most patient,
eventually throughout the two-hour ride even Justin seemed to be getting
less enthusiastic about Andi’s endless exclamations. After five
minutes Chad had given up and bellowed at Andi to be quiet.
The picnic was wonderful. The clearing was plentiful and green,
and there were lots of squirrels that quickly made friends with Andi.
The bubbling brook was delightful, and even more so was the dinner that
Mother brought for all to share.
Chad pulled Andi aside and led her up a steep hill to where the
water turned into rapids and frothed against the sharp rocks. Just
seeing the frenzy made Andi shiver and shrink back against Chad.
“Never go near this,” Chad warned sternly.
Andi bit her lip at her brother’s bossiness, but nevertheless nodded. “Yes, Chad.”
Then she ran off to play.
They were staying at the picnic all day, so Andi had plenty of
time after dinner to explore. She made friends with a squirrel she
called Silky, because her coat was so beautiful and shiny.
Justin and Mitch were busy building the fire, and Mother and
Melinda were talking, so Andi ran up to Chad, with Silky scurrying
behind her. “Look, Chad! Look! Here’s the squirrel I named Silky,”
she said proudly.
Chad grinned. “Looks you can make friends with anything, huh?”
“Yes—” Andi started to respond, but was torn off by a sudden
movement and Silky darting away. Whirling, she cried, “Silky, no!” and
ran off after the squirrel. She heard Chad laughing behind her.
The squirrel darted up, up, up the steep hill and started
digging at the edge. Andi caught her breath, and remembered Chad’s
warning—never go up this hill near the water. Her decision was made
when Silky suddenly squeaked and got pulled under water. Andi gasped.
She had to save her squirrel! Taking off at a run, Andi ran up the hill
and peered cautiously over the edge. She wasn’t going to go in—but if
Silky came near the edge, maybe she could—
“Andi, no!” Chad’s bellow sent her spinning in surprise. Andi
lost her balance. She teetered on the edge, then a giant wave grabbed
her foot and pulled her in.
Andi screamed. It was so cold! She screamed again—then a wave
pulled her under. Andi gulped water and tried to pull her way up to the
surface, but the rapids were strong and whipped her under. Her body
was thrown against a large rock, then Andi was whirled off, being tossed
by the ruthless waves.
She kept fighting, but she couldn’t get her head above water—she
needed air—air—she heard shouting—who was shouting?—then…
All of a sudden, she heard a closer shout, then strong arms
grasped her round the middle and pulled her above water. Gasping and
crying, Andi flung her arms around her rescuer and hung on tight. It
was Chad. He swam her through the weaker parts of the rapids and
finally dragged both of them ashore.
Andi folded down onto the ground and started gasping. Her world was spinning, and her body felt sore and bruised.
Then two strong hands were placed over her shoulders, and she
was spun around to face a very, very angry brother. “Don’t you EVER do
that again!” Chad shouted. His face was angry and scared. “Not ever!
You could have been KILLED!”
Andi started to cry. She was too breathless to say “I’m sorry” but instead she flung her arms around Chad.
“Are you all right?” he asked in concern, his angry mood
evaporating instantly once he saw she was hurt. Andi started coughing
and shivering. Tears ran down her face. Her body tingled with shock.
Just then, Justin and Mitch came running up, breathless. When
they saw Andi, they engulfed her in hugs, even though they came away
dripping wet from Andi’s saturated clothes. “Thank God you’re alive,”
Justin breathed.
“Here’s my coat,” Mitch offered, handing it to Chad. Chad said
nothing, but his face was worried as he wrapped Andi tightly in the warm
jacket and picked her up.
Andi’s coughing had subsided, but she remained shivering long
after Chad had carried her down to the fire and tried to warm her up.
The whole family had gathered around and sent up a prayer in thanks that
Andi had been rescued, and then Chad and Justin began to question Andi
more seriously on what she had done while the others packed up their
supplies.
“Andrea, you knew very well not to go up that hill.” Chad’s voice was short and clipped.
Andi tried to nod through another flood of tears. “Y-yes, Chad,
but you don’t know why I went. Silky got swept in the water and now
she’s probably drowned.” More tears slid down her face.
“I would much rather have Silky drowned than you,” Chad returned
shortly, but Justin was a little more comforting. He wrapped his arms
around his sister and hugged her.
“Andi, you know what you did was wrong. You disobeyed Chad and
in doing so you almost lost your life. I know you didn’t mean to at
first, and I know you must be feeling sad over Silky, but you must
remember that obeying your elders is more important than losing an
animal.” Justin’s face was serious, yet firm and kind.
Andi nodded, sniffing. “Yes sir.”
Chad stood up. “Well, I’d better go help Mitch.”
“I’ll join you.” Justin stood up as well and offered a hand to Andi. “Shall we?”
“We shall!” Andi cried, breaking into a smile. She ran and helped Mitch load the buggy.
On the way home from the picnic, Chad turned around and asked
with a teasing smile, “Well little sister, even though you fell in the
water did you still like this picnic?”
Andi thought for a moment, then nodded slowly. “I’m still upset
over my squirrel, but I learned an important thing, and that’s never to
disobey anyone. Especially you, Chad, because you yell.” She made a
face.
Chad laughed, then turned back to face forwards. “All’s forgiven little sister. All’s forgiven.”
This was AMAZING, Scotia! I loved it! It was beautiful and very well-written, and your spot-on descriptions gave me a clear picture of the settings the whole time. :-) Keep writing!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Ellen! :) :) :)
DeleteAww this is such a cute story good job!
ReplyDeleteGreat job, Scotia! I love this story! =)
ReplyDelete-Hannah
Thanks, Hannah!
DeleteThat was great, Scotia! I agree with Ellen...you did a great job on descriptions! And I loved how this story showed both sides of Chad: the yelling part, and the caring big brother part. Great job! Keep writing!
ReplyDelete-Abigail J.
Thank you so much, Abigail! Chad and Andi are my two favorite characters... LOL ;)
DeleteI could picture what was happening! Great job illustrating every thing so clearly, Scotia! Amazing!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kaitlyn! :)
DeleteCongratulations on your first Andi story, Scotia--I enjoyed it!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
ReplyDeleteVery good story!!! I loved it!!!
ReplyDeleteL.R.
Thanks, everyone, for all these encouraging comments! :) :) :)
ReplyDeleteLove it
ReplyDeleteNice story! I can't wait to read more from you Scotia. :)
ReplyDelete~Elate
Thanks, Elate! I will definitely continue writing :)
DeleteWhat a great story! I thought Andi's brothers were well done, quite in character. Keep writing!
ReplyDeleteEmily
Thank you, Emily!
DeleteGood story!
ReplyDeleteMaddy
Good job! That was a really cute story!
ReplyDeleteAMAZING job, Scotia!! I loved it so much!! Keep writing!
ReplyDelete~Grace Hammond
Great story! Loved the details!
ReplyDelete