Sorrow Overcome by a Child's Ways

 by Maddy E. (ages 10-13)

 

“I’m going to head back home and make sure the horses get watered and fed!”  Mitch called out to his older brother.  Chad turned at the sudden shout and nodded his approval.  

“Alright! I’ll be there shortly!”  Chad bellowed.  

“C’mon, Chase!”  Mitch prodded, pivoting his horse.  He cast one final glance at Chad, who stood a few yards away, putting brands on the last few calves.  Then Mitch gently dug his heels into Chase’s flank and took off at a breakneck gallop.  

Twenty minutes later, the ranch yard, outlined by the bunkhouses, chicken coop, spring house, and various other buildings, came into view.  Mitch pulled Chase to a standstill and scanned the horizon.  

His six year old sister, Andi, was near the barn, playing with her palomino, Taffy.  Mother sat on the porch, sewing a quilt square.  Her lips were formed in a frown.  

Ranch hands sulked around the yard, each off to complete various tasks, and each caught up in their own sorrow.

“It’s a mighty gloomy place around here,” Mitch confided to his horse.  Even though James Carter’s death had taken place over a month ago, people were still mourning his passing.  He was a man of great character, and when he died, he left a wound in whoever had the pleasure of meeting him.  

The hired help had lost their boss.  Elizabeth Carter was a widow.  Andi, Melinda, Mitch, Chad, and Justin were left fatherless.  

Mitch grimaced at the thought.  He was about to dismount and lead Chase into the barn when he caught sight of the hay barn out of the corner of his eye.

A smile of remembrance spread over his face as a memory snuck into his head.  Mitch cocked his head, letting scenes from the past play out in his mind . . . .   

 

“Katy?” Five year old Mitch called through the door softly.  When he didn’t hear a response, he ventured farther into the vacant ranch house.  “Katy?  Wanna come do something with me?”  

A head, framed with brown curls, peeked above the railing.  “Like what?”  The small girl questioned.  

Mitch grinned.  “Aww, c’mon down, Katy.”  His voice dropped to an excited whisper.  “I’m going to go play in the hay.”  

Eyes wide with amazement, eight year old Katherine bounded down the rest of the steps.  “This’ll be so fun,” she agreed in a quiet voice.  Mitch nodded enthusiastically and fled out the door.  Kate followed suit.  

The two children jogged across the yard until they reached the hay barn.  “How do we get inside?” Katherine pondered, peering upward at a window.  Stray strands of hay spilled through the opening.  

Mitch shrugged and circled the barn.  “Let’s look around.  Maybe we’ll find a door or something.”  

The siblings investigated their surroundings and came across two large doors that appeared to lead right into the building.  Mitch glanced at Kate.  “Should we give these doors a try?”

Kate returned a mischievous grin.  “I don’t see why not.”

Mitch reached up, barely able to reach the handle.  Finally, he gripped it, and Kate tugged on the other door.  

“It’s not opening,” Mitch complained, arms aching.  He kept pulling, as did Kate, but neither door seemed to budge.  “What should we-”

Thump. Mitch’s voice was cut off when the planks of wood came flying open, and with them came hay.  Loads of hay.

Kate let go of the handle and slapped a hand over her mouth, trying to suppress a giggle.  Mitch didn’t even try to muffle his laugh.  Whooping, he threw himself through the entrance and onto the pile of hay.  

Kate just stood there, speechless, until Mitch cried out, “Come play, Katy!”

Katherine didn’t wait for farther persuading.  She followed Mitch’s initiative and leaped into the loose hay.  

Mitch paused from his wallowing long enough to glance up.  All around him, bundles of hay lay in heaps, some piles small and other reaching clear to the ceiling.  

Mitch could already feel hay creeping under his clothes, and a bundle of hay landed on his head before sliding down his face.  He giggled and dove back into the yellow strands.  

“This is fun!”  Katherine squealed.  She lay a few yards away from Mitch, spread out like a star fish.  

“We should play a game,” Mitch suggested, popping his head up.  Kate glanced at him.  

“Yeah, that’d be neat.  What game?”

Mitch puckered his lips, deep in thought.  “A-ha!  I’ve got it!”  He exclaimed finally.  

“What is it?” Kate asked curiously, scrambling over the hay to reach Mitch.

Mitch’s eyes grew wide.  “We should play hide and seek!”

Kate gasped.  “Yes!”

“Ready or not, here I come!”  Mitch warned twenty minutes later.  Kate and he were on their third round of hide and seek, and most every time one of them were found buried in hay.  

Tromping through the barn, Mitch’s eyes scanned his surrounding before resting on a brown clump.  Grinning, he ran to the spot and flopped.  Kate laughed.  

“Aww, you found me.”

“I always find you!”  Mitch bragged with a childish smirk.

Kate raised her eyebrows.  “How about I hide again?” She offered, then added, “and I’ll hide-”

“What is wages is going on in here?”  A booming voice interrupted.

Mitch glanced up.  In the ultraviolet rays the sun cast down, he distinctly made out the figure of a man standing in the doorway.  The shadow moved farther into the barn.

Mitch gulped when he recognized the man.  It had only been a few short weeks since Matthew had come from the East, and Mitch wasn’t fully acquainted with his fifteen year old cousin.  “I’m sorry, Matthew,” he apologized.  “It was my idea.”

“No, I shouldn’t have gone along with it,” Kate cut in.  

Silence fell.  The two siblings clutched each other, afraid of what consequence may await them.  Finally, Mitch spoke up in a tiny voice.  “Matt, are you gonna tell Father?”

Matthew’s face split into a smile.  “No, buddy.  I won’t tattle on you.”

Mitch sagged with relief.  

“So you aren’t going to tell?”  Katherine asked doubtfully.  

“No, sweetheart.  It’ll be our secret,” Matthew assured his younger family, trudging through the hay.  When he reached Kate and Mitch, he dropped into the hay and ruffled Kate’s hair.  

“As a matter of fact,” Matthew began in a whisper, “I’ve always loved playing in the hay.”

Mitch leaped to his feet.  “Oh, Matt, then you’ll love playing hide and seek with us.”

“Yeah!”  Katherine agreed, nodding her head enthusiastically.  “Won’t you please play?”

“I dunno, kids.  I probably ought to go-”

“Oh, pretty please, Matt!”  Mitch begged.  He grabbed Matthew’s hand and yanked.

Matthew rose to his feet, grinning.  “Fine, fine.  I suppose I could maybe play just once.”

Mitch let go of his cousin’s hand and began to jump.  Kate joined in the celebration.  

“Now, Matt,” Mitch explained, trying to catch his breath, “you can hide wherever you want, just so long as you stay in here.”  He leaned in.  “And hiding inside the hay piles works awful well.”

Matthew acknowledged Mitch’s comments with a slight nod.  Mitch nodded back, but not before realizing the grimacing expression that passed over his cousin’s face.  Mitch remembered with a start the real reason behind his cousin staying with the Carters.

A month ago, a letter had arrived explaining Matthew had been diagnosed with a fatal heart disease, and Aunt Rose and Uncle John had hopes the fresh ranch air would be a cure.  

When Matthew arrived, he assured everyone he could still do his share of the work, and ever since, Matthew had acted as though nothing was wrong, except for a few looks of agony that washed over his eyes.

“I’ll count first!”  Mitch exclaimed suddenly, pushing those thoughts away.  Matthew would be just fine; the doctors had assured him he would likely put this phase behind him by the end of the year.  

Mitch clenched his eyes shut.  “One, two, three…”

 

“Alright, Katie, I think it’s time to head back inside,” Mitch decided.  Matthew had left a while ago to finish ranch work, and now evening was falling.  

Mitch peered through the open doors.  Sunlight spilled through the west opening, and light was seeping in from cracks in the wood, casting eerie shadows across the barn.

“Yep, let’s go,” Katherine said, grasping Mitch’s hand and lugging him out of the hay.  Once outside the barn, they slid the doors closed and ran back to the house, brushing hay off their clothes as they went.

“So, should we tell Mother and Father about our afternoon activity?”  Mitch asked, twisting the knob on the back door.

Katherine shrugged.  “Mmm, I don’t think so.”  She looked at Mitch, her eyes twinkling.    

“Sounds good.”  Mitch grinned and threw the door open.  Kate followed him inside and they slid into their spots at the table just as Louisa entered with the food.  

Father blessed the meal and then a flurry of activity exploded.  

“Please pass the chicken.”

“We got a good days work in, Elizabeth.”

“What have you been up to all afternoon, Mitch?”

Mitch froze, a spoon of potatoes halfway to his mouth.  He was surprised Mother would ask such a question directed to him.  He stole a glance at Katherine, than Matthew.  “I, umm, I played,” he stammered with a sheepish grin.

Mother looked at Father and raised her eyebrows slightly, suppressing a smile.  “Oh really?”

“Yes, Mother,” Katherine cut in with a sweet smile.  “Mitch and I played together outside.” 

Justin bore his gaze at his younger siblings.  “If you say so,” he said doubtfully.

“We do say so,” Kate confirmed stubbornly.  The topic was closed.

 

“Psst, Kate,” Mitch whispered, tiptoeing through the hallway.  All was still, except for muffled chatter taking place downstairs in the library.  Mother and Father were no doubt enjoying a late night talk.

“Yes, Mitch?”  Katherine peeked her head out of her doorway.

“Wanna play in the hay barn tomorrow?  When you get back from school?”

Kate nodded.  “Yep, that’ll be fun.  See you in the morning!”  She disappeared back inside the bedroom.  Smiling to himself, Mitch walked timidly back to bed.

 

The sound of violent sobbing tore Mitch from a peaceful sleep.  He lay still for a moment, gaining his composure.  A minute later, he crawled out of bed.  “Father?  Mother?” He ventured farther into the center of his room, where sunlight spilled through the window.  

“Father?” Mitch tried again.  No reply.  

Dressed in underwear and one of his daddy’s old shirts, Mitch made his way to the door, intent on discovering what was going on.  He silently pushed his door open and took a step into the hallway.  “Moth-”

“I’m in here, Mitch!”  A voice rang out.  

Mitch jumped back at the sound, nearly falling down.  He gripped the doorway and caught his balance before progressing down the hall.

“Father?”  Mitch stuck his head through a doorway.  A lump caught in his throat at the sight which met his eyes.

Mother sat near the door, tears flowing freely down her cheeks.  Father sat not far away, a grim expression on his face, but even at the raw age of five Mitch noticed water droplets in Father’s eyes.  

Mitch scanned the room again and caught site of Kate sitting near the window.  She was sobbing.  

“What’s wrong?” Mitch whispered, casting a sidelong glance at the corner of the room.  Normally Matthew would be sleeping there, but the bed was vacant.

“What’s wrong?”  Mitch repeated.  Striding across the room, he sank to the ground and wrapped his arms around Katherine.  “Shh, Katie,” he soothed. 

“Matthew’s gone,” Father murmured at last, his eyes haunted.  “His heart just gave out, I suppose.  He died in his sleep.” Father buried his face in his hands.

Mitch looked from Mother to Father, then back to Mother.  She nodded slightly.

No!  Mitch’s mind screamed.  Matthew couldn’t be dead.  He just couldn’t.  Less than twenty four hours ago he had been playing in the barn, jumping in the hay and laughing.  

Yet, everywhere he looked gave way to evidence that Matthew truly had died.  Mother crying.  Father beside himself with grief.  Katherine sobbing.  The empty bed.  

Mitch allowed the news to sink in.  It would likely be many, many years before he saw his dear cousin again in Heaven.  Melinda would never know him.  Even Mitch would likely lose grip of the few memories he had made in the previous weeks.  

Mitch released a little whimper.  He tucked his face into the folds of Kate’s dress and allowed the tears to come.  

 

The rest of the morning passed in a gloomy blur.  None of the Carter children attended school.  Father and Mother decided immediately it would be best if everyone stayed home, perhaps for the rest of the week.  

The hired help insisted their boss and family have a day of rest in order to handle their sorrow.  Father didn’t decline the offer, nor did he protest when the foreman offered to wrap up Matthew’s body and put it someplace safe until services could be held.

The hours trickled by.

“May I please be excused?” Mitch requested near the end of the noon meal.  

“Yes, Mitchell,” Mother said wearily.

Mitch fled from the table.  He faintly heard Katherine asking to be excused.

By the time he reached the stairway, Mitch’s sprint had slowed to a solemn walk.  Katherine ran up behind him and locked her hand in his.  

“C’mon, little brother.  We should go play in the hay!”

Mitch twisted around to face his sister.  “I dunno…” His voice trailed off.

“Aww, pretty please!  It’ll still be fun!”  Kate’s voice rose to a whine.  A desperate plea.  

Mitch sighed.  Before he could reply, Katherine started pulling.  “Hurry up!  We don’t want to be caught!”

Kate led him through the back hall and out the door into the fresh air.  Then she tugged him along till they reached the hay barn.  

Once inside, Mitch’s sorrow dissolved into giggles as he plunged headlong into the straw.  His heart still ached, but with God by his side, he could overcome this obstacle life had thrown at him.

 

Mitch raised his hand, swiping away a sudden tear that was seeping down his cheek.  It had been over ten years since that fateful day, when his kind cousin had passed suddenly.

Mitch adjusted himself on Chase, still gazing thoughtfully at the hay barn, where him and Katherine had made so many good memories.  More importantly, that building not only was a place for alfalfa, but so many years ago it was where he had found healing.  It was because he played and allowed himself to laugh did Mitch overcome a great loss.  

And now, just as he had done following Matthew’s passing, Mitch would overcome Father’s death in the same childish way: using laughter and play as medicine during a grieving time.